By noob
Very good assignment text in case you want others to know the general information about the Holzweiler brand. I think you need to use more syllabus and information from PowerPoint we used in class. Your language and the length of the text is good, and it is interesting to know what Holzweiler specializes in.
Anyway, you should use more sustainable fashion as a theme, and a topic hook that creates excitement. For example, a question or problem issue that will bring curiosity to those who read your text. It must also touch on a conclusion, so the best way to do that is to take a real-life case that is about the environment or maybe compare Holzweiler with other brands that use opposite guidelines in fashion. Also, a plus to specify with the link from the site you use as information.
The teacher also said something about linking to some words and phrases based on the internet, and I think you did well. So keep doing this. As I have already said, you have not used as much syllabus in your thext, and on the exam you have to show sensors that you understand the task and design markets. The criteria should reflect on one aspect of the course. Reading your thext, I never got the answer to the task. You must specify which designer market Holzweiler belongs to and why. Then start writing about the case and then describe with the theory.
If you have more time and want some creativity, I recommend posting a picture of Holzweiler to show how the design of the brand looks, to specify your choice of design market. But remember that the artist in the picture has to be mentioned. Also remember to write less academic, use more emotion and your own point of view. Pretend you are writing a blog about sustainable fashion.
Making sense of art and design industries 